Radio 2, I’m It’s Target Audience So Why Can’t I Abide It?

At 47 I’m probably slap bang in the middle of Radio 2’s target audience. According to the BBC Trust, “the remit of Radio 2 is to be a distinctive mixed music and speech service, targeted at a broad audience, appealing to all age groups over 35” – so me then ! Why then can’t I abide the station?

Ten years ago I used to dip into Radio 2 and quite enjoy some of it, Wogan was always entertaining in his own way, Jeremy Vine was fairly fresh after replacing Jimmy Young. Jonathan Ross, Johnnie Walker and Radcliffe & Maconie always entertained, but then Chris Evans arrived, Ross got sacked and it wasn't the same any more. I ended up listening to Radio Manchester, which is brilliant for sport and local stuff but the music is middle of the road dross.

Earlier this year Radio Manchester “refreshed” its weekday line-up, the new pair on breakfast irritated me so I decided lets give Radio 2 another go – big mistake! After a week listening to it I've turned off – so why did I do that when its aimed at me, I'm its supposed target audience?

Well in summary the reasons I'm not going to listen to Radio 2 are:

1. Self congratulatory style of presentation, especially Steve Wright, Jo Whiley and Vanessa Feltz
2. There’s no flow to the music, it’s like they've been thrown in with no thought
3. Too London centric
4. An obsession with traffic reports
5. Inane chat - just too much Smashie n Nicey
6. Over paid DJ's - BBC Radio 2 has a £15 Million budget
7. It is essentially an independent local radio station without adverts
8. Tailored for those who need background noise
9. It is not entertaining in any way
10. Tie ups with lowest common denominator TV programming

But let’s have a look at the daytime roster a little closer to see the irritants:

Chris Evans

This man so loves the sound of his own voice and everyone who comes on the show seem to be plugging something or other, or they're so far up their own arse its untrue. With Evans’ constant name dropping and in your face jingles his show is beginning to resemble Ed Stewart's Junior Choice from the 70s.

These days Chris Evans is just plainly awful. He is a bullying egotist who belittles his own co presenters. For some inane reason he seems to think that we wish to listen to his children on national radio, Chris - we don’t! He talks constant drivel in a very loud and irritatingly cheerful voice, and, equally constantly, interrupts any music tracks and guest interviews. He seems to like to hear his own opinions more than listening to anyone else's views.

Maybe his show should've been titled, “Me and my rich friends and expensive life”. I've read his autobiographies and admire his rags to riches story but it now appears to be very much about the riches.

A quick summary of his show would be “How do you like your eggs in the morning? at Carfest Everybody! I know Nick Mason! How many Ferraris do I own? I'll buy another one tomorrow - thank you Taxpayer; here's some more sound-clips of my son Noah who is probably Christ. Did I mention Carfest by the way? Here's some Coldplay. I earn millions."

It is about time that this over inflated ego was put out of our misery. After listening to three hours of infantile drivel delivered with a screeching voice and an obsession with giggling I'm sure he’d be better hosting a pre-school children's slot.

Ken Bruce

The excruciatingly anodyne Ken Bruce seems to be a throw-back to the 70s if not earlier. How has he survived doing essentially the same show since 1984, that’s over 30 years !!!! I suppose its helped his career that he sounds a bit like a tepid imitator of Wogan,

I can't find words to describe how cringe worthy he and his traffic side kick, Lynn Bowles are to my ears. The so called 'banter' between Bowles and Bruce is truly embarrassing. His show is simply beige in colour, a watery broth and excruciatingly ordinary. It really is the “cheese factory”, maybe a career on Saga Radio (if it exists) beckons

Jeremy Vine

Another one who loves the sound of his own voice, debating subjects like a 6th former and trying to convince the audience of his music knowledge. His show is sensationalist nonsense disguised as debate. It feels likes he’s broadcasting at you rather than to you.

With his patronising rubbish and his largely pensioner phone in's. The Jeremy Vine Programme does seem to be the BBC's answer to the Daily Mail.

I liked Jeremy when he was on Newsnight, bit of an anti-dote to Paxman. Maybe with Paxman gone Vine’s career would benefit from being booted upstairs back into proper journalism.

Steve “Love The Show” Wright

Steve Wright is, and always has been awful. He began on Radio 1 as a piss-poor wannabe Kenny Everett and evolved into some dreadful pseudo American treacle toned gob shite. He was a vacuous, narcissistic, irritating, unfunny prat when he was on Radio 1 thirty years ago. He hasn’t improved with age. He's one of only two presenters on Radio 2 who've been rehashing the same show since the 1980s (Bruce being the other one).

On the unfortunate occasions I've listened to his programme I've noticed he seems to either sing over the end of the song, cut the song short so he can talk or just talk over the top of the song every single time. ‘Ask Elvis’ is good I’ll give you that but ‘Barry from Watford’ needs to be put down. I really can't stand all the chummy stuff, the reading out of newspaper articles and the hilarious laughter over rubbish gags.

They say Steve Wright has 6 million "listeners", well there might be 6 million radios turned on but no one in their right mind is listening to his inane programme.

Simon Mayo

Listening to Simon Mayo’s show was just a chore. The endless banter and congratulatory laughter between the presenters thoroughly bored me. Simon’s monotonous voice just grated on me. Cheer up mate, you’re presenting drive time, it’s the end of the working day, everyone’s cheerful because they’re off home we want a cheerful voice to listen to on the way home.

The show seems to have way too much chat. The in-jokes, giggling and lengthy interviews in just two hours is not exactly what you want when stuck in a traffic jam. Oh, and why does the show need so many co-presenters?

So its hats off to Simon Mayo as the most charmless presenter on the radio, tedious beyond belief. He sounds so uncomfortable presenting the drive time show. I just get the impression he wishes he was anywhere else but presenting this show – probably back at 5Live actually where he came across well.

Why No Women?

Having listened to Radio Manchester for a few years I've got used to female presenters (two of their four daytime shows are presented by women with a third co-presenting breakfast). So tuning back to Radio 2 I found a complete lack of female presenters during the daytime, none of the regular presenters from Chris Evans at breakfast to Simon Mayo’s drive time show are women. Very strange in this day and age!

What Radio 2 has is horrible, awkward banter between the DJs and Lynn Bowles and Sally Traffic - it's dated and sexist (they both seem to play up to this image of the dumb lady sidekick that I thought went out in the 70s), and not the slightest bit funny, just generally painful.

There's a feeling that women don't want to listen to other women, which is utter rubbish. Maybe there's a feeling that men won't listen to a woman. That's rubbish too. There's no evidence for any of this.

In truth, it shouldn't really be about male to female ratios, it should just be about who is best. If there are better female presenters, put them on daytime. But if there are better male presenters, then why replace them? And if they're just as good as each other, then a mix of male and female presenters in the daytime schedule would be welcome. Going off the above, I'm firmly convinced that there’s better presenters out there than the stale ageing crowd that are on Radio 2 at the moment.

Jo Whiley used to be on daytime Radio 1, and Lauren Laverne is on 6Music, so it's not as if there are no daytime females. Yes, there would be uproar if they sacked, say, Evans, Bruce or Wright, and replaced them with say Sara Cox or Zoe Ball, just for the sake of putting a female voice into the daytime schedules  One I am firmly convinced of though is that Janice Long or Liz Kershaw would be great on Drive time, much better than Simon Mayo!

I sympathise with Radio 2's problem, and think the tactic of putting on women to cover holidays for the regular line up is a good holding tactic until an opening appears for a full time female presenter. There have been some brilliant female presenters over the years, remember Annie Nightingale? So where’s the current crop? Radio 2 wouldn't do too bad to look to local radio for some new female blood.

Where Now For Me?

So the question is are Radio 2s daytime programmes massively popular BECAUSE of the presenters, or DESPITE the presenters? I suspect their daytime programmes would be pretty popular regardless of the presenter, but in it’s current format Radio 2 is not for me.

Personally I've switched to Radio 6 Music for my listening needs - the DJs don’t just gas on about their cars, kids and celebrity friends and actually seems to both know something about the music but also care about what they’re playing...and the music is better as well ! The documentaries are interesting and overall there’s a warmth to the station.

One question I do have is why can't they put Radio 1 on DAB only and hand over the VHF transmitters to Radio 6 Music?